SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
