Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
