Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Rumble strips road head = magical
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize