i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize