yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
i came on her dog
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
