I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
