she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
