So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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