I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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