I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize