Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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