i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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