Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
