Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
