She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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