you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
