we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
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