Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
