I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
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