shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I CAN MOONWALK!
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
