It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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