Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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