ugly people sure do ruin things
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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