sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
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