love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
