the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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