And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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