Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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