Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize