My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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