You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
