Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
