Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
she told me i tasted like america
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize