i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
