Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
