why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
