We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
