Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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