see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize