You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
