he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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