i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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