God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
