My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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