I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
