That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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