I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
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