i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
