Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
