I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize