i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize