so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Its guy fieris flavor town of sufferingâ„¢
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize