I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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