Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
